You Better Watch Out…
I’m not exactly the most knowledgable person when it comes to music, or specifically, Christmas music, but after hearing several different versions of the same Christmas songs over and over again today, I have to say there is no better rendition of “Santa Claus is Coming to Town” than the one sung by Bruce Springsteen.
We went out tree hunting this afternoon. What makes the perfect Christmas Tree? Do you prefer Douglas or Noble Firs? To Flock or not to Flock, that is the question, poor Yorick (piss off, Shakespeare purists). Does price matter? (We couldn’t find a tree for less than 30 bucks — and that’s the littlest, dinkiest tree on the lot) Obviously, we all KNOW size matters (we went with about a five footer). And there is something unnatural about walking through a parking lot filled with trees. My girl & I both remember the days when the family would pile into the car, drive down to the Christmas Tree Forest, and the friendly-albeit-scruffy-looking employee in the Santa hat would give Dad a handsaw and off we’d go find the “perfect” tree and cut ‘er down.
So, we spent 40 bucks, threw the tree in the back of the car and drove around the corner to bring it upstairs and into our home. We manged to get it in & up & about 78% decorated tonight. Predictably, the cats made the tree stand their personal watering trough so I had to wrap it in foil before I got mad enough to throw one out into the semi-cold (it’s been a mild December here). The house would probably smell like pine - if I could smell, but allergies & the dry desert air have all but destroyed my once-all-powerful sniffer.
Here’s my Vegas-ized version… of the good song Bruce belts out so mightily:
You better bring cash, you better bet big, better lose a lot cuz Vegas needs it – Santa Claus is not a whale.
He’s playin’ roulette, his number’s already hit twice, and he always wins big when he throws the dice — Santa Claus is not a whale.
When he’s upstairs sleeping, he gives the casinos a break, and he knows if you’ve lost bad or won big because you’ve probably posted it on MySpace!
Oh! You better bring cash, you better bet big, better lose a lot cuz Vegas needs it — Santa Claus is not a whale – Santa… Claus… Is… Not… A… Whale!
The fat, jolly elf may look like a whale, but let’s face it, he is MAGICAL, for crying out loud! There’s no way he’s going to LOSE on the tables! Always bet on red!
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